As I said at the end of last weeks post I’ve been trying online dating! I’ve signed up to 4 of them, that’s as much as I can stand. Here’s my conclusions on my experience.
My overarching thoughts
- I don’t believe that you can fall in love with someone online. Period. I blogged about this earlier (follow this link to read it)
- Dating apps/websites take advantage of peoples desperation and loneliness when they charge them as much as they do.
- I’ve really lost respect for middle aged Caucasian men lol. The fact that they are even trying bothers me because I think to myself, if the internet is a place where people tend to loose their inhibitions, that means that they must be thinking those naughty things about me outside the internet but not vocalising it. This makes me feel less safe. I honestly didn’t think that middle aged men looked at me twice but turns out that they do! I suppose men are men.
- I do not want to date someone from Essex, nothing wrong with them it’s just I live here so I want more variety, my guy friends are Essex and that’s enough. I want to travel go somewhere new not stay put with the same people doing the same things in the same places with the same people.
- My home town is incredibly small and every time someone from my home town finds me it bothers me, yes, my postman found me on one of the apps…disturbing.
- The people group that I am apparently most INCOMPATIBLE with are the ones who contact me the most.
- Just because a guy says he’s a Christian and is on a Christian dating site doesn’t mean that he is 🙂 – I knew that already I’m just writing that for the benefit of my readers.
This is the picture of me I’ve put up
View this post on Instagram
#FOOTAGE FROM MY #GIG ! Variety Evening Live @ The Gospel Centre 28/07/17: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLyXNhxziFkz88WzbItcG74PS-SAMTH_Lk #freelance #musician #musicteacher #worshipleader #gospel #Christian #singer #songwriter #producer #music #Jesus #woodgreen #London
Should I add this one?
I can’t believe that dress still fits! It’s the dress I wore to my school prom when I was 16! This picture was taken 10 years later!. Do you think this will get me a date? I’ve also uploaded a picture of me playing the harp and the guitar and a selfie of me with a piano lol.
Statistics on how things are going so far:
- Average profile views per day: 930
- Number of people who want to meet me: 1000+
- Total unread messages across all platforms: 117+
- Average likes/winks/etc a day: 5
- Youngest person to try to interact with me: 18
- Oldest person to try to interact with me: 67
People I’m compatible with (apparently according to the apps/websites)
- Nationally, I’m most compatible with African-Caribbean men.
- Locally, I’m most compatible with Caucasian men, (N.B. Essex is not very ethnically diverse)
- Internationally, I appear to be most compatible with Caucasian American men.
- The people group I am least compatible with is Caucasian British men…
People who contact me the most – in order of frequency
- Men late 20’s – Mid 30’s
- Caucasian British men….
- Caucasian men from the European mainland who reside in Britain
- Middle aged Caucasian men who really ought to know better
- Middle aged African men – they are the most persistent
- One woman?….??!!?!?
- People who think it’s a good idea to ask me stupid questions… here’s an example – “Would you wrestle a man?” No you idiot I’d die *rolls eyes*
People who I date the most
- Caucasian British men…
People group that my male friends mostly consist of
- Caucasian British men….
The apps/websites say that I’m not romantically compatible with British Caucasian men although they make good friends. I can only date the people who ask me and as of 12/04/2018, I’ve been alive for 10,195 days and outside of the internet only 3 of them were spent being asked out by my own ethnicity that’s 0.029426189308484552% of my life. To be fair we are only 5% of the population. However, again, outside of the internet, whenever I have been asked out by my own ethnicity they were to the point and asked me the same day they met me lol, whereas I noticed the Caucasian guys that asked me out left a gap between meeting me and asking me out. Just an interesting cultural observation. Which begs the question of considering I was born and raised here, why do we differ so much so as to be not romantically compatible? Moreover, knowing that, why are they still trying to contact me? What do they lack that they feel that they can get from me? However, I’m not completely incompatible with them as an ethnicity, on the Christian dating sites, I’m more compatible with British Christian Caucasian men than any other ethnicity. Interesting!
I’ve been toying with putting up this picture? What do you think?
People who view me – in order of frequency
- Caucasian British men
- Caucasian American men
- Middle aged Caucasian British men
- African-Caribbean British men
- African-Caribbean American men
- African-Caribbean French men
- Old Caucasian British men
- Don’t upload a profile picture with you and another woman who is your “friend”… – Any woman seeing that will have flashing lights go up in her head and hear “Danger Will Robinson!”.
- Don’t upload a profile picture with you and other guys – Fewl! I don’t know which one is you! Only you know which one is you!! I hope it’s the one I’m attracted to but it might not be so I don’t bother, the fact that you’re stupid enough not to think that through says all I need to know anyway…
- Pictures with you and children are nice, shows you have a soft side.
- Don’t upload a profile picture that obscures your face.
- Don’t upload a picture of just your abs – I can’t have a relationship with just your abs come on….
- Stop taking selfies in the mirror with your phone its stupid.
- For goodness sake smile in your photos!
- Don’t ask women stupid questions.
- Don’t take pictures in Black and White, or pictures that are over exposed, or have a soft focus or are taken at a funny angle or have your hand obscuring your face somehow *rolls eyes* just show people your real face. I’ve blogged about this (follow this link for more).
- Don’t lie about yourself or use someone else’s picture.
- Lack of ambition is anathema to me…
- Don’t start out your message with “I know I’m probably not your type but….” If you know that then why are you talking to me lol? A defeatist is of no use to me. Take off those panties and put on some big boy pants, seriously, my metaphorical balls should not be bigger than your actual ones. Be brave, just say “Hi” and leave it at that, let me judge whether we are compatible or not.
- Don’t talk to people that you wouldn’t normally talk to outside of the internet, in ways that you would never talk to them outside of the internet, it’s just creepy. The same way you read me here is how I am in real life, the same people I would talk to online are the same people I would talk to outside of the internet and the same people I DON’T TALK TO ONLINE, are the same people I wouldn’t talk to outside of the internet.
- Double check that the woman can speak the language you’re communicating in. Yes I can speak French (to an extent) but… CLEARLY MY PROFILE IS WRITTEN IN ENGLISH AND SAYS I SPEAK ENGLISH ONLY, SO WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME IN FRENCH? DO YOU WANT A DATE OR NOT? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?
That’s all I’ve got so far. We’ll see how this stupidness ends lol.
P.S. when’s a good time to tell people you have diabetes and that they must adopt your two dogs? Answers on a post card!
Lots of love